Standing Out Not Standing The Same
After 10 years of counseling students and parents, the oddest thing that I still have trouble processing is that almost every parent and student knows that they need to “stand out” in their college application. However, their actions do everything but make them stand out.
There are thousands of international schools around the world. Dubai has over 100 international schools in one city. This isn’t counting all the private schools in the US, UK, and Canada plus the other thousands of bilingual schools in China, Korea, India and places like Vietnam. Each of these schools is producing at least 3 to 5 students that are qualified for the Ivy Leagues or similar highly ranked institutions. You also have to consider all the students that are applying from the thousands of public schools not just in the United States but the world at large. There are over 1 million applicants a year for the 50,000 spots in the 20 most selective US universities and colleges. 50,000 spots for 1 million plus applicants, that gives you less then a 5% chance of getting accepted - how do you stand out?
What do most parents do? Study more, cram more, thinking their son or daughter needs a higher GPA or higher SAT score. How does that make you stand out? Almost every student applying to an Ivy League college has a score above 1500 on the SAT and a GPA of 3.9 or better. Selective schools routinely reject about half of their applicants with perfect SAT score - yes you read that correctly and can google it - HALF the applicants with perfect SAT scores are rejected at Harvard. Stanford rejects about 60% of perfect SAT score applicants.
So why are so many parents focused on standardized tests? I am not sure but my sense is there are two perceptions at play. One is cultural and the system in Asia itself which is focused on testing. The second is probably that it is a very objective and measurable comparison. My child got X and my friend’s child got Y, therefore my child should be more attractive to admissions officers.
The problem with this mindset is that it just doesn’t work and is actually causing your child to miss opportunities that might otherwise be available to them. I am not saying that GPA and test scores are not important, quite the contrary, GPA is probably the most important factor in your application. I am saying though that almost all the applicants to selective schools have high GPAs and test scores. So again I ask, how do you stand out?
Helping your child find and develop an interest in middle school is probably one of the best things you can do. Get them involved in something outside of school and make sure they love it, have a passion for it, want and are willing to spend time pursuing it. Parents spend so much money and time on academics when they should be spending time on helping their child find a passion and interest. Owning a company, starting a non-profit, working, servicing the disadvantaged, creating artworks, Vlogs, Blogs and anything else that might spark their interest is the grease needed to make your child stand out. Make sure they aren’t just doing something different but make sure it is part of who they are and what they love and make sure they are doing it for more than a summer or two before they graduate from high school.
Start early and spend time or find a counselor that is more of a mentor to your child. Academic help is everywhere. People that actually care and want to develop long lasting relationships to help your child recognize their own uniqueness and strengths are farer and fewer between. Spend your time and money helping your child stand out and not be the same.
Famous Alumni
John Dennis Hastert, a former Congressman and past Speaker of the House of Representatives of the United States of America. As majority leader in the House of Representatives Hastert was after the Vice President next in line to the Presidency. He is a graduate of a Christian liberal arts college called Wheaton College in Wheaton Illinois where he received a bachelors in economics in 1967.
